Sunday, January 24, 2010

nothing much is happening

Well the baby shower for my best friend was yesterday and went extremely well. I am so glad that it is over though! My whole body is sore from cleaning and standing for 2 days but it was worth it. She got so much great stuff and other than almost every guest asking when I was going to start having kids and try to catch up with her having her 3rd, it was very nice.

So as I mentioned I started and things haven't been bad at all. For the past week or so I have had HORRIBLE right ovary pain and am currently sitting in a massage chair with a heating pad trying to quit the ache but no help yet. I'm worried that the pain in the past might have been small cysts and since it has gotten so much stronger since I got off birth control that it may be a bigger cyst.  I am going to wait until I have to make the next appointment and if it is still bothering me, I will ask for it to be looked into further.  Other than that, not much is new. Because of the craziness of the shower I did not start temping or my opk yet but I am doing both in the morning!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Yesterday was CD90...

AND TODAY IS CD1!!! Whoever knew that someone could be so happy about getting their period!  It has been amazingly (knock on wood) routine. Very little cramping and light bleeding so hopefully my horrible expectations have made this easier! So the plan is to begin temping as well as starting doing an opk and on the off chance that the pro.vera alone triggers ovulation we will be ready.  I know I'm getting WAY ahead of myself but if this were to be the cycle we would be due October 28th (3 days after my sister and grandmother's birthday) and we would get a positive just before our 1 year wedding anniversary!!!

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

could it be?!

This morning I woke up to some mild cramping. Nothing is here yet but on all of my cycles with the birth control pill I would cramp for a few hours before I started so we will see what happens! Today is only 2 days/48 hours after my last dose of pro.vera so who knows. I have a LOT of running around to do today and tomorrow so I'm sure it'll hit right in the middle of everything. I will be prepared. HERE'S TO TODAY CHANGING FROM CD90 TO CD1!


***update***
false alarm. It's alright we've got 8 days for something to happen!

Monday, January 18, 2010

today...

was the last day of our first round of pro.vera!!! So now the waiting begins! Hopefully in 3-10 days my now 88 day long cycle will end and a new one will begin.  The good news is I'm off work (on vacation) until the 29th so I won't have to worry about accidents but the bad news is I'm throwing a baby shower on Saturday and my birthday is on Monday but I can deal!!! 
I'm thinking temping won't work for me because I normally get up at least once a night to go to the bathroom and that will mess it all up. I did buy a store brand OPK and plan on starting it so hopefully it will show if anything is happening. If the 20 strips come and gone with no ovulation shown I will just use dollar tree ones until I make my dr appt for 2 months cd1 if another cd1 doesn't come on its own!

Friday, January 15, 2010

I'm prepared!

Wel Dr P told me there is a small chance that pro.vera alone will make me ovulate.  I have 3 pills left and then my 3-10 day wait and then finally cd1! Anyway I had to go to the drug store today after work because I have had horrible right wrist pain and I saw this commerical for icy.hot medicated roll and wanted to try it.  I can feel the Icy but not the hot part yet and I smell like a peppermint factor! Well the icy.hot just happened to be next to the ovulation predictors/pregnancy tests so I decided to go ahead and buy a 20 day opk (I had no idea they were that expensive!!!) and a basal thermometer!  Lets hope they indicate that my body is acting right! Only time will tell!!!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

all about other people's babies!

So I work in a 911/dispatch center for local law enforcement and since I'm one of the lowest on the seniority scale, I work days Friday-Monday.  Last year I found out that one of the officer's (from an agency I worked with before this current one) wife was pregnant. A few months before baby W was born his mom posted something on facebook saying she was having a hard time finding good childcare; I commented saying I was available Tues-Thurs and amazingly, those were the days she needed help. So anyway, I started watching W when his momma went back to work at 12 weeks and he's an absolute joy! He's almost 5 months old and already in 6-9mo clothes! Oh, and today he rolled over for the first time ever!!! I know 5 months is a little late but I think it's because he's so chubby he couldn't get enough momentum to roll over! Haha! I called his mom at work to let her know and while she was glad he finally did it and glad I called to let her know I could hear the sadness in her voice that she missed it.  I hate that and that's a main reason why I pray that when it is our time to have a baby that I'll be able to stay home for the first few years!

Other big baby news is that my best friend is already dilated to a 1.5! It's too early! She was 34 weeks monday so they baby would be fine but it's still too early! After having some discharge and cramping throughout the weekend the doctor finally saw and checked her today.  All he did was cut her work hours in half and tell her she needs to atleast make it to 36. I figure if he was too worried about it happening too soon he would have put her on bedrest.  I'm throwing her shower on the 23rd so she better make it that long!  All of the shower stuff was delivered today. I figured that 60 dollars worth of stuff would have been in a bigger box but it is super cute! She better pay me back by throwing me an awesome shower! And hopefully that shower will be sooner rather than later!

The only other thing that's going on is I'm halfway done with my first dose of pro.vera. I'm really getting nervous about what is to come though because, gross I know, but there is 3 months of gunk built up and this will be my first non birth control one in forever... Oh well if it mean we're closer to pregnancy then I'm ready!

Saturday, January 9, 2010

We've started!

Well, it's official, we are actively trying to conceive baby #1.  I took my first dose of pro.vera this morning at 7:30 and have set an alarm for the next 9 days to be right on time. 

I think I am going to start temping after cd1 but have some questions... E leaves for work at 4am and I wake up as he's leaving so is that too early to take my temperature? I normally go to bed around 10:30 so that would be just 5.5 hours of sleep but I've read that waking up messes it up if you take it later... any input would be greatly appreciated!!!

Friday, January 8, 2010

Drumroll please... we have a diagnosis!

And the winner is-PCOS, Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. Not so much a winner, but at least an answer. It's odd feeling slightly relieved when you're diagnosed with something that will make having a baby difficult but at least it is an answer! I was completely convinced that I would get in there and Dr P would tell me to lose 30 lbs and come back and see him in 6 months if nothing has happened. Well instead he spent a good half hour talking/listening/writing/studying with me and at the end came to the finding of PCOS. I am so thankful that I do not have to try in vain for a year before getting to this point!

So the plan!

Take a pregnancy test tomorrow morning and then begin taking pro.vera for 10 days. Dr P said it's unlikely but it MAY jumpstart my body into acting correctly and I could COULD ovulate on my own. (The baby I nanny during the week was a pro.vera induced ovulation on the first cycle baby!)

Chances are that will not happen so if I go 2 months after cd1 then I go back in for Clo.mid. I called our HR dept at work today and they told me that fertility is covered yet the prescription website says clo.mid isn't. Luckily it only costs $24 a cycle starting out so we will see.

After that he said it is at my discretion how fast and how intensive things get but he's very hopeful that clo.mid should do it which in turn made me very hopeful.

Once again, I'm getting way ahead of myself but if we get pregnant from the pro.vera alone then we'd have a baby at the end of October. If we go on to clo.mid and the first round works we could expect a great Christmas gift! Ideally the husband and I are expecting/hoping/wishing for a spring/summer '11 baby!

For all of you who take pro.vera, is there a certain time of day I should take it? I know it needs to be the same time daily but no one specified if it should be morning noon or night. Also what, if any, side effects are common?



It is now time to eat chili and cornbread. In lovely mild Texas it is currently 22* with a windchill of 13!!!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

DR APPOINTMENT IN THE MORNING!!!

My best friend of 18 years is currently pregnant with her THIRD child and due in 7 weeks. I am doing her shower by myself (not out of greed but out of the fact that no one has offered to help.) Not only is it getting very expensive it is a ton of work! Today when ordering the decorations I found myself buying one extra item so I qualified for free shipping! I might as well get something for the money I was having to pay!  I also have a big hot glue gun blister on my thumb and pointer finger because the ever so cute ribbon on the invitations was ever so difficult and I had to glue it to keep it down! Anyway, this of course just makes me want to have my own baby shower and be about to have my first baby, let alone 3rd!

Oh, and also adding to the baby fever is the fact that I nanny a 4 month old baby boy Tues-Thurs and he was all grins and giggles today! I WANT MY OWN BABY!

Anyway, like I said, tomorrow is my doctor's appointment to try to figure out why I'm on cd77 (78 tomorrow) with no period!  I pray he is proactive and begins to figure out what the problem is rather than making me wait a few more months to begin everything. I know I sound horrible right now because so many people try for years to get somewhere and I'm just in a  few months but I want to get things figured out as soon as possible.

We recently got a "no facebook, personal email..." memo at work and I assume blogger falls under that so it will be tomorrow night before I can update... Wish me luck!!!

Monday, January 4, 2010

One step in the right direction

I already know what the first thing I'm going to hear on Friday, "You need to lose weight." I am in no way denying the truth in that.  I am of course the heaviest I have ever been.  I was never skinny and don't even desire to be a size 4 (or 6 or 8) but I have gained 25 pounds since getting married only 10 months ago.  I'm ready to be healthy and I know this is horribly selfish sounding but I want to be able to look pregnant once that time finally comes.  So anyway, I'm convinced that Dr P is going to tell me that I'm just too heavy to have a period but I know that's not all of it. Regardless, to start things in the right direction I decided to get on the elliptical tonight. I figured 5 minutes would be as long as I could make it having not done anything in a long time but was able to make it for 10 and that was over a mile and then did 50 crunches on the ab lounger. Nothing really to brag about but at least it's a step in the right direction.  If I can do that twice a day and slowly go longer and do more each day hopefully I'll be shedding the pounds in no time! The other goal is to start eating half of my normal portions.  Maybe that will help convince my body to behave normally and also in turn prepare me for having a healthy pregnancy when that time comes.  It also adds a little motivation that the workout equipment is in our current office which will be our future nursery :)

Oh, and seeing as today is cd74 I decided to take a dol.lar tree hpt this morning and it was of course negative.  Oh well, doctor appointment in 4 days!!!

Sunday, January 3, 2010

A little more that I forgot to add...

Here's a bit more that I forgot to add to my history. About 5 years I noticed that I was going to the bathroom A LOT and I had really painful intercourse. I went to my then GYN and she did blood testing and ultrasounds and everything was okay. She then decided she thought that it was Interstitial Cystitis (basically your bladder gets inflamed because minerals/fluids/wastes are permeating through the lining and in turn irritating your pelvic cavity--lovely, right!?) so I was referred to a Urologist who treated me for a few months and everything has been fine since. When I was getting the internal ultrasound for that diagnosis however I told the Dr and the tech that I had experienced on and off right sided ovarian pain since high school and they checked it out, telling me everything looked normal.

A few years ago I went to my GYN (different Dr from the previous one due to graduating and getting on my own insurance) for the same symptom of the right sided pain. I was seeing a nurse practitioner and she believed it was possibly due to a small cyst so she took me off of nu.va ring and placed me onto high dose fem.con. She said to try that for 3 months and then if no change to come in for an internal ultrasound. Of course there was no change (other than horrible side effects from that nasty pill) so the ultrasound was ordered and done by a doctor in the medical group. He spent a long time looking at both ovaries and my uterus and said that everything looked perfect, no cysts or anything else that shouldn't be there. He said that the pain could be from a few different things such as endometriosis but if that were the case I'd be having a lot more symptoms especially if it was bad enough to cause ovarian pain, cysts but they should have showed up on the ultrasound, or and most likely that I just had a muscle that was pushing on my ovary. That made most sense to me as well because it only is noticeable when I'm laying on my right side...

The other bit I forgot to add was that my half sister (same dad different mother) has been diagnosed with Hashimoto's Disease, basically hypothyroidism. However (before she found out she had this) I had a yearly appointment with the family doctor and in his blood work he did check my thyroid and there was no problem...

So that's all for now and probably will be until after Friday's doctor visit. I am however turning into a POAS (pee on a stick) addict I think. Up until now I've just taken a wal.mart brand fir.st res.ponse test once a week since I've had no period. I know that since I'm now on cycle day 73 it'd be no good to use an ovulation predictor but yesterday the hubs and I were at dol.lar tree and I bought 5 ovulation predictors(for after I finally have a period) and 5 HPTs. The teenage checker looked at us like we're crazy. $5 for 5 sure beats $10 for 3!

Oh and another thing. My sister, J, lives in another state and as I mentioned yesterday she's finally going to see a RE after trying for quite some time. I was texting her about buying all the tests and how I was just ready to start my period after 72 days and was hoping the Dr would at least help me do that. I've tried to make it very clear that I'm not going to the Dr because I'm not pregnant yet. I know it has only been two months and it normally takes longer than that, even for people who have no problems. She got very hostile and asked why if I'm not worried about not being pregnant yet then why I'm worried that I'm not ovulating/having a period and then said that "at least it hasn't been 18 months of trying and you aren't almost 30!" I feel badly for her thinking that I'm taking her difficulty in conceiving lightly and then it made me realize that many of the blogs I am following have been trying for many many months if not years and they may feel the same way as J does. I wanted to let everyone know that I am not calling myself infertile because I have had no period; I in absolutely no way take your struggle to start a family lightly; and I am in no way comparing my 2 months of no period to your months or years of trying to conceive. I am only wanting to share with you what is going on with me and learn from what you all have gone through to help my journey along. I think J's reaction is why I'm keeping this blog private from my friends and family and to anyone I have offended, I am sorry!

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Maybe a bit early, but I'm ready!

So I guess I've done it-I've made a TTC blog. I'm sure everyone probably thinks this is really premature but I'm ready for it and my journey is just beginning so here we go, and thank you for joining the ride.



I suppose I should start with a little history... My mom had very irregular periods and was placed on the pill at a very early age. She was told that it would probably take some time for her to get pregnant after getting off of the pill but it happened her first month off (why not for me too!?) with my older sister, J, and again with me 5 years later. My sister and I both had problems with late periods growing up and all tests were done. J's blood work came back showing she had high testosterone and some other issues but mine was all normal. We were both put on the pill, J on some other things, and all was fine. That was back about 10 years ago and here I am today. J being almost 30 decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and start trying (early '08) before she got married (may '08) and still has had no success. Although she had one period a month after quitting the pill everything has been quite sporadic sense. After the wonderful "1 year of trying on your own" she was diagnosed with PCOS by an endocrinologist last summer and is finally going to a Fertility Specialist in March after months of metformin and other meds. This immediately raised a red flag for me having known my family history as well as knowing that PCOS and many other fertility problems are genetic so I talked to my doctor last year and he said there was no need to worry until we ran into problems. I expressed my concern with my then fiancé, E, and he didn't understand why I was already talking about it and seemed to think it would happen right when we wanted it. After getting married in February I was ready to start trying, knowing it may take a while and then we'd already have our 1 year worth of trying in by the time we were planning on a baby, but my husband, E, wanted to wait until we were "ready" and then get off the pill since he just knew it would happen right away. --If we would have tried then it seems by now, now that he's ready, we'd be close to getting help IF there is a problem.--


SO, here we are 2 months after quitting the pills AND I STILL HAVEN'T HAD A PERIOD. After 6 weeks (being 2 weeks late) of nothing I called my Dr, Dr P,'s office and was told to wait until I had nothing for 8 weeks/2 months late and then come in. That appointment is for next Friday, January 8th and I am a ball full of nerves. I am so anxious and hoping that he'll just induce a period and then everything will fall right into place but I'm sure it can't be that easy. I am pretty sure he'll tell me to lose weight, quit worrying, and come see him after I've tried for a year but I'm not even worried about not being pregnant right now- I JUST WANT A PERIOD!!! Luckily, while he isn't a RE he does specialize in fertility at the local hospital so he is definitely the one I need to see for now.


I know that I shouldn't even worry about it because we are just starting to try but I am so ready to be a mom and to make E a dad, I know he will be AMAZING! Now that we've been married for almost a year the wonderful "when are you two gonna have a baby?" question is always asked. I wanna shout out "AS SOON AS MY BODY DECIDES IT'D BE A GOOD IDEA TO OVULATE!!!" To make things even harder it seems like EVERYONE I know is either expecting, has a newborn, or is about to start trying for #2 (3 or 4!). But here I am, just waiting, reading other blogs for support and trying not to get ahead of myself. I have read through a few blogs already and am so amazed with the strength that women trying to conceive display through all of the heartache and trials on their journey to parenthood